mae grwp o bobl yn byw mewn bocs. rydym yn byw mewn gwald sy’n cael ei coloneiddio. bu’n digwydd ers oesoedd. migldimagldi lawr y star. beth yw honey yn gymraeg ? Meeeel. beth yw male yn gymraeg? dyn. Beth yw dean yn gymraeg. dibynnu ai celine deon yntau deon warwick chi’n meddwl. pwy yw deon warwick?

gwawd gwald gwlad.

yes those conspiracy nits are out and about. right now they’re by the front door. i’ve never been able to do the things that i always meant to do. i’ve never been able. nobody is. the fore runner of peter cook was a man called chef. he was a sous chef, everyone sued him after eating the food he made. usually from the hospital.

i myself have suffered from food poisoning, the results were not pretty. writhing on the floor, in pain, not knowing which end will release next. Please release me let me go , i can’t love you anymore.

i know i’m not a cambridge grad. i say old boy i remember homerton college.

conspiracy nuts sure are something else…they’re ships, or bricks, or shits. going down mumbles for eggs benedict and tea. weather getting weird. a heatwave accompanied by rain. Gigged in chelmsford, stayed with a couchsurfer, a nice guy from Rumania called Chip. he came to the show which was literally 5 minutes away from his home. the gig was a in a big function room, which i did last year with Bob mills. this time i headlined. nice audience. got the train to and from swansea, managed to do it quite cheaply….cash 4 clothes closed ’til september. but found a pair of shoes by Barbour in the tip and got a bid for 11 pound for them on ebay. Bought a massive Godzilla – king of the monsters – in the Swansea boot sale last Sunday. Forgot to tell yas….i went down in the morning in my hire car, then walked around the boot sale, bought a few pieces of crap including brass binoculars, a guitar, and some toy cars. then this huge Godzilla rears its head. cost me £18. so, i’m walking around with this GZ under my arm, next thing a bloke taps me on the shoulder “you haven’t paid for that, you nicked it, take it back…” i say i don’t know what he’s talking about. “Take it back or i’ll call the police” Call the police i say. ” Take it back or i’ll batter you”. he goes on liek this, i say call the police, i say mind your own business, i say i paid for it, he says ” show me where you bought it”…so, i’m pissed off now, so i lead him to the stall, where the jamaican bloke confirm that i bought it from him. suddenly the accuser is apologetic, but i say, very loudly and firmly, Fuck Off ! twice, and walk off….Ten mins later i am walking around again, when he comes up to me again and tries to be all nice, clearing his conscience, saying sorry…i this i that…

Maybe Nutter should take a leaf from his book.

heard some crazy stories. the comedy circuit is full of nutters. the woke thing i am empathetic with i think, but the trouble is when censorship looms as a result of people feeling offended. there are lots of intelligent peeps arund too of course,

jokes man…

got a last minute medical role play gig in swansea yesterday. what an easy day – only a handful of exam candidates, so i got an extended lunchbreak, and walked into the city, picked up my extra money – for Cu gig – from Derricks.

did something which i meant to talk about here. but my mory’s fucked. em,

watched some episodes of Harry and George. that was made as recent as 2010, but even now, only 14 years later, i don t believe they’d be allowed to get away with some of that stuff….though i think it’s fuckin hilarious. really funny impressions.

did i tell you i capsized my kayak last sunday ? it was bracing , it was refreshing, but my trainers turned grey. Well there’s a lot of mud at bottom, but it’s not deep. i go down every sunday, it’s totally peaceful and lush as they say. the sun reflecting like glass off the still water, the green trees forming a canopy of silence. I went down there today and saw John Collins as well as geraint. isn’t it nice, talking to people?

did a welsh language gig in Clwb y Bont, Pontypridd, on tuesday, i was totally out of it – have i said that already ? the first gig i have done in clwb y bont since 2013(?), despite there being a regular english gig there. My friday gig at Norwegian Arts Centre, Cardiff Bay, went very well. But only 5 people of the 15 tickets bought. Pobl y cwm actor turned up. ahhahh shame there weren’t more coming down from the Steddfod, i tried quite a few new-ish jokes, and a song about nazis, in welsh, to the tune of Can Yr Ysgol. Eleri hated it but it actually got a big laugh. Gareth the manager was pleasant as always,