byw yn abertawe’n gallu bod yn dipyn o straffalde.

england wales scotland jersey…everybody talk about pop mersey. Been doing the usual, driving around, like a lorry driver, delivering jokes. Trying to escape my past whilst gorging on the future. Ramshackle gig last night in Weston, to help raise money for foodbanks, It came together, and went well.

Did, the night before that, something in Suffolk. Ipswich actually. an intresting venue: Archives run by the council. that was actually a classy modern theatre, and the show went great. (well i think it did ).

On Monday a beautiful little gig in abergavenny. a door split but got £100 for it. so the crowd must have appreciated it. They were laughing at everything, well it looks that way when i’m watching the other acts, but when i go on i can’t help but notice the non laughers.

Did a gig last week in Gwaelod y Garth. Tiny village a bit like Craig Cefn Parc. That was pretty good too. The trouble i have occasionally is getting the crowd with me at the start, as they have to tune in to my humour. Luckily there was a woman, a member of the audience, right down the front, sat in the light. I got a lot of milage out of her, she was tipsy and looked a bit like Angela Merkel (call me Anj). Had some nice compliments afterwards, one bloke come up to me, said he was a printer, i thought i know his type.

Did one in Warwick, in the Warwick arms hotel. the compere left during the first break as he had a panic attack. They treated me very well, even offered me a free room. I got a lovely meal, with dessert, and a glass of wine. the problem with consuming wine before a gig is, even though you feel sober, i think the focus is lightly off. a fact which was demonstrated as i walked on stage clutching a cup of coffee in one hand and a chair in the other; as i brushed past a member of the audience i spilled my coffee on her trousers. luckily they were leather – like water off a duck’s back. i said sorry, was too apologetic perhaps, but hey i don’t want to get sued. The following weekend Eleri and I stayed in the same hotel for both saturday and sunday – discounted rate! Warwick is a small but perfectly formed town, very pretty, with an ancient castle, an arch, and some interesting shops. unfortunately a lot of them were closed due to easter holiday, but hey our luck was in nevertheless…..on the way up to Warwick, as we pulled out of a services, we saw 4by4 with its rear door open, and as it sped away case fell out, and onto the road. i ran out to grab it. A day later, in the relative calm of the hotel we check the contents of bag – there’s an expensive laptop, passport and birth certificate for a child. No tel no at back of passport but lo and behold we did eventually find a no…on the top of a receipt for a Ferrarri! (not joking). cut to chase. The man, who i will call Driango, drove up that evening, in his Ferrarri, with his son, to pick up the bag. He was so appreciative on getting his bag back that he gave up a bottle of champagne – that was in the bag already – and then handed us an £80 voucher for theatre entertainment in Malverns, plus a £200 voucher for a hotel. Wow ! fair play. Mind you, i did ask if i could have a ferrarri instead. I was curious so I asked him what he did for a living. you’ve guessed it: Investment manager.

My girlfriend is so lonely she plays solitaire even when i’m in the same room…